Yet I am Always With You (The Day Before Surgery)

I wrote this the day before my surgery...

Yet I am always with you;
    you hold me by my right hand.
You guide me with your counsel,
    and afterward you will take me into glory.
Whom have I in heaven but you?
    And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
    but God is the strength of my heart
    and my portion forever.

(Psalm 73:23-26)

I’m not sure what to write here. Before I go any further I need to make it clear I expect to make it through surgery tomorrow just fine and recover well. But since there’s always the possibility that something might go wrong, I feel as though I should write this.

I don’t know, maybe I’m worried because my dad went into the hospital for surgery last year and never came out. But here’s the thing…I don’t feel worried. I am confident that my God will take care of me. I am confident that even if the “worst” should happen and I don’t make it through, I will still be taken care of and so will my loved ones.

Notice I put “worst” in quotes…I believe that even death is not the worst thing that could happen. I believe, like the apostle Paul, that: “To live is Christ and to die is gain.” But I am confident that I will continue living and be able to rejoice in being cancer free.

I don’t know if people think I’m naive for feeling like I do, or that I am foolish for trusting God like I do, but I don’t care. God is my savior and in him I will trust.

I made it through fine, as expected. Actually a bit better than expected. I feel better than I thought I would, the incision, though bigger than I thought it was going to be, doesn't hurt nearly as much as I thought it would. I can't drive as of yet, but I am hopeful that I'll be given the go-ahead to drive at my follow-up appointment on Wednesday. I probably won't post any pictures until the staples come out as it looks kind of Frankenstein-ey.

Some big news...

I know it's been a looooong time since I posted anything here, but I have some big news to share. Here is the body of an e-mail I sent to a few friends today...

I want to share some news with you that I’ve recently received and request your prayers. A couple of months ago my doctor found that the lymph nodes on the right side of my neck were swollen. This finding led to a couple visits to the ENT doctor and a CAT scan and a biopsy all to find out that I have thyroid cancer.

That’s the bad news, now to the good news…

The type of thyroid cancer that I have is relatively easily treatable. In a couple weeks I will undergo a thyroidectomy where I will have my thyroid and the affected lymph nodes removed, then the area will  be treated with radioactive iodine to ensure all the cancer is gone, then I will need to take a pill to make up for what my thyroid used to do. The type of cancer that this is (I don’t remember the name, the doctor told me but I forgot) is a very slow moving cancer and she is confident that my upcoming surgery will take care of all of it.

It’s been almost 20 years since I gave my life to Christ and I will honor God and honor that commitment no matter what comes my way. Three years ago I lost my right foot and I took to heart the promise in Romans 8:28; “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” I don’t know why God has allowed me to go through this, but I will praise God when things are good and I will praise him even when things are bad.

God is a good God and his nature is unchanging even when troubles arise in our lives and so while I do ask for your prayers in this situation, for my safety as I undergo surgery, for comfort to my family and friends as they go through this with me but mostly that God shows me how I can use this situation to glorify him more and share his love with those around me.  I also ask that you take some time to honor God for the good that he has brought into your life.

Thank you all for your prayers and I’ll keep you updated as things progress.

All to Jesus I surrender;
All to Him I freely give;
I will ever love and trust Him,
In His presence daily live.

I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to Thee, my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

All to Jesus I surrender;
Lord, I give myself to Thee;
Fill me with Thy love and power;
Let Thy blessing fall on me.

I surrender all,
I surrender all;
All to Thee, my blessed Savior,
I surrender all.

 

Update the first...my surgery has been scheduled, it will be Thursday, November 21 at the Rutland Regional Medical Center in Rutland, VT.